Principes Cognitifs
Cognitive Principles

Mary Major B.A.. soc./ psych



 

'Coaching Pour Vous Aider' 'Coaching to Help You'

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Recovery's Prescription for Mental Health

AVOID DUALITY

IMPORTANT TEXTS AND REFERENCES TO SUPPORT YOU DURING YOUR HEALING PROCESS

 

Excessive Need for Control:

Our Outer Environment

  • Anger

Striving for predictability in our live's clouds our perception of the value of what meaningful control is. It prevents our finding stability in trusting in life's proven processes.
Excessive need for control has it's origins in trauma we have suffered early in life making us feel powerless and predisposes us to illness causing vigilence.
Survivors of severe trauma construct highly controlling personalities, wanting to be controlled or giving up feeling they will never be in control leading to depression. This is referred to as "learned helplessness"
Healing requires time and persistance.

Following are four (4) strategies found to be helpful in overcoming excessive needs for control:

Acceptance:

  • learn to live more comfortably with unpredictability
  • be aware of changes you will encounter in other's behaviour
  • you will not always be prepared -(startle effect)
  • lower your expectations - non-resistive
  • release your perfectionism
  • command relaxation

 

 

 


Recovery's Prescription for Mental Health

AVOID DUALITY


Excessive Need for Control cont'd

  • Sense (a serious) of humour allows a retreat to freshen perspective.
  • Statments such as "I'm learning to take life as it comes" and "It's OK to let go and trust that things will work out" (ask Mary for tape)
  • Cultivation patience: as patience develops, we will learn to let go and wait for a resolution to surface.
  • Trusting that most problems will resolve themselves. (developing trust means believing that just about everything "does" work out)
  • Developing a spiritual approach to life.

Selected Bibliography:

Full Catastrophe Living: Williams, Dr. Caroline 2006 New Science Publishing

The Feeling Good Handbook: Burns, David 1995 Plum Books Publishers
(see pps 53)

 

 



 

 

 

email:info@marysrecovery.org | Tél: 514-485-2194